MARRYING AMERICAN
by
Daniel John
I left Halifax for America in 1980 but I never thought
about being a snowback—a Canadian illegal immigrant—until
1983, when my money began to dwindle. I couldn’t get a
student visa because my massage and movement therapy school
in Amherst, Massachusetts, was too small to meet the
Immigration and Naturalization Service’s definition of
“school.” I couldn’t work at a real job because I had no
social security number, so I worked infrequently as a
masseuse. Even when I lived on canned macaroni and Jell-O,
I still preferred America, because here I had the right to
be myself, to have feelings, and, wildest of all, to be
different. In Canada I was always one apology short. I had
to apologize if I acted without other people’s approval, if
I let my feelings show, or if I stood out in any way,
especially positively. If I came first in anything I had to
go on and on about how I didn’t deserve it, it was just an
accident, and anyone else could have done better. If I
stood up for myself in Canada, politely turned-away faces
told me I should be ashamed of myself for being rude,
conceited, and acting like an American.
But when my parents offered to send me a plane ticket for a
family reunion in Saskatchewan, hunger overruled my
sensibilities. I flew to the Land of the Nice for a week of
dull, nourishing food and fiendishly complex conversation.
I hardly knew how to interpret the Canadian code anymore,
the secret ways to probe what someone really means when
they say “yes” (because for sure they don’t mean “yes”);
the thrust and parry of alternating apologies; and the many
polite ways to avoid putting someone in the embarrassing
position of having to say either yes or no. Once I’d gained
a few pounds I was glad to come home to the United States.
The plane landed in Toronto to put people and luggage
through American Customs and Immigration before continuing
on to Boston. “Where do you live?” a young woman in a green
uniform asked me as she examined my documents.
“Nova Scotia.” That was easy. That was where my children
lived, the ones I couldn’t visit because my ex-wife and I
couldn’t agree on how many were mine. She said I could see
two or none. I said I had to see three or none. So we’d
settled on none—but without speaking, since we didn’t talk
to each other anymore.
“What do you do for a living?”
“I own a natural foods store.” Close enough. I’d sold it
two years earlier.
“Where did you buy your ticket?”
“Halifax.”
She looked at me thoughtfully, then went through my
backpack, taking out and examining each item. She pulled
out my journal and thumbed through it, reading here and
there. I was terrified she’d read about the time right
before I left for Canada, when I made love to menstruating
Janice. “Why are you looking through my journal?”
“To see if you really live in Canada.” Her eyes bugged out.
Uh-oh. That was Janice. She slammed my journal shut. “How
long has it been since you were in Boston?”
“Three years.”
“This plane ticket was issued two weeks ago in Boston. You
have just lied to an Immigration Officer. This is grounds
for deportation.”
“Well, a lawyer told me that snowbirds who live in Florida
for six months out of the year don’t have to—”
“Lawyers have nothing to do with it!” She threw my stuff
down on the counter like garbage, then said angrily, “Next
please!”
I stood there with belongings dragging down my arms while
she processed the next person. “May I speak with your
managing officer, please?”
“Go ahead. He’ll back me up. You lied to me. Next, please.”
I withdrew to the Canadian side of the border and knocked
on the door marked “INS.” I was told to sit on a bench and
wait. My nervous sweat cooled and I shivered. The plane to
Boston left. Finally, the American in charge called me in
to his office and I told him about the school that didn’t
qualify. “There’s nothing I can do,” he said. I was doomed.
All I had left in Canada were the children I could not
visit. I had to live in the wrong country from my boys or
die of grief. I forced myself to my feet and turned to
leave.
“Wait!” I froze. “If you’ve been a student in the States
for nearly two years then you’ve got all your stuff there,
right?” I nodded. “I’m going to give you two weeks to pack
and move back to Canada.” He paused, then added quietly,
“But you must promise to return after two weeks.”
We both knew America had no internal controls on illegal
immigration. We also both knew I would tell the truth. “I
will return in two weeks,” I said, trembling like a piece
of paper in a breeze. He stamped my passport with a
two-week visa. In fourteen days I would either have a green
card or be run over by a truck on the Canadian side of the
border.
The next flight to Boston didn’t leave until morning. I
spent the night in the airport underneath a bench, jerking
awake over and over again to the strains of fluorescent
Muzak.
Once I was safely back in Massachusetts I checked the INS
regulations. Massage therapy wasn’t even on the list
of waiting lists. My only option was to marry an American.
I had thirteen days to find a wife.
My sixteen fellow students at the School for Body-Mind
Centering were single women in their late twenties. One
after another, each woman told me she would have no trouble
marrying a stranger to help him stay in the country. The
problem was I wasn’t a stranger. After two years of shared
intensities we were bonded like soldiers in a war, but not
one of them could say “I do” unless it was to a real
marriage. To argue with the definition of “real” was like
talking to a TV set: no matter what I said, I got a 1960s
sitcom for an answer. I not only had to promise monogamy, I
had to promise it for the rest of my life. I couldn’t even
promise to stay alive longer than the eight days remaining
on my visa, which was when I finally gave up on marrying
American.
On my last American Friday I went to one of my favorite
places, a weekly rough-and-tumble community party called
Dance Jam. At halftime I sat on the steps outside and told
a friend my border story. “So, I have to go back to Canada.
My friends like me too much to marry me.”
“Oh, I’ll marry you!” I whipped my head around. A
bright-eyed young blonde was coming down from the top step
to sit next to us. “This country is so sexist! About the
only power women have left is to get foreigners into the
country.”
I shut my wide-open mouth and asked her questions. Her name
was Jane, she was 22, and nearly almost entirely sure she
was a lesbian. She’d graduated from Smith College that
spring and worked as a waitress so she could stay in
Northampton, the lesbian hub of the Northeast. My heart was
hammering with hope, but I told her I’d wait three days,
then call her. In fairy tales true things always take three
days. I held onto her phone number like a monk clinging to
the tooth of a saint. I called on Monday. “Yes, I’ll marry
you,” she said.
“Can you meet me tomorrow for the blood test?”
“I have to work today and tomorrow. But I can take the rest
of the week off.” I fretted like a nervous cat for two
days. We had to get all the documentation together before
Friday at two p.m., when I had to be out of the country or
be a liar.
On Wednesday Jane and I lay down next to each other and
gave blood. It felt like premarital sex. On Thursday we
arrived a few minutes after five at the courthouse in the
small town in New York State where she was born. The clerks
had just finished closing up, but they opened up again just
for us to put the official seal on her birth certificate
that Immigration required before she could legally sponsor
her husband into the country. On Friday morning at 10:30,
wearing the stiffest clothes I owned, Jane and I got
married. We walked out of the registrar’s office and drove
to the INS in Boston. I had three hours left on my U.S.
visa.
“That was such a joke!” Jane said, driving too fast. She
stuck her lips out like a duck and mocked the clerk, “‘Do
not enter lightly into marriage!’ It was all I could do not
to laugh in her face. We get divorced in eighteen months!
What a joke!”
She lit up a joint. I opened the window. I’d better do all
the talking to the INS. Marijuana breath over there did not
have a winning attitude. A hot breeze licked my face. When
the registrar asked me if I solemnly swore to take this
woman to have and to hold from this day forth, my hands
went clammy with fidelity. When I said, “I do,” my heart
moved all its cookies into her kitchen. I was about to
swear to the United States of America that this was a real
marriage and not one entered into for purposes of
immigration. To lie was a felony, punishable by two years
in jail and then deportation. The car swayed as Jane zipped
out from behind a huge truck. Being nearly almost entirely
sure she was a lesbian meant there was an infinitesimal
chance she could fall in love with me. Her large breasts
were alarmingly perky all of a sudden. I wondered if she
even owned a bra. I looked out the window at the trees
flapping by like happiness in the hot and humid honeymoon
air as we zipped down Newlywed Pike to Boston in July. It
was already too late. I was going to have to tell the
truth: this was a real marriage.
We sat on a long, wooden bench in a room filled with
couples from all over the world. Jane opened her purse and
pulled out a baggie of pot. “I’m not sure I should have
brought this with me. Will you put it in your pocket?”
“Possession would get me deported,” I whispered,
scandalized. She shrugged and put it back. Americans were
so ridiculously entitled. She even sat like an American,
sprawling her legs out any way she pleased, as though she
owned the place.
“Oh, right!” the agent said, rolling her eyes. “Get married
then immigrate on the same day!” Months later I discovered
the INS verified a real marriage by putting the husband and
wife in separate rooms and asking them questions like,
“What kind of underwear does she wear?” then
cross-checking. Most couples studied for weeks to make
their marriages look real—even when they were. But to ask
Jane and me those questions would be to imply we’d been
living in sin. She asked a lot of other questions, and
examined our faces carefully as we answered. Since I was
her real husband, I wasn’t faking anything when I treated
Jane with that special married mix of consideration and
condescension. Jane put on a performance as the Coy New
Wife that was as good as anything on daytime TV. After half
an hour the interviewer stood up and said my green card
would arrive in the mail in a month or so. I exulted like a
Canadian: invisibly. Showing off is wrong because it might
make other people might feel like losers.
Back in Amherst I saw Jane once a week for a massage. Each
time I rubbed her nude body down love and yearning poured
out my hands like honey. She talked nonstop about herself,
and when the session was over dressed languorously in front
of me like a movie star, then gave me a big hug and left.
My hope that she wasn’t entirely lesbian glowed more
certain with each delicious massage. Every week I’d ask her
out to something innocuous like a group dance, a picnic, or
an open-air play. Her face would light up with pleasure.
She’d say yes, great, see you then. . . . then stand me up.
“I just forgot, that’s all! Okay? Okay!?” she would say
each time I asked her where she’d been. It was many weeks
before my hope shrank to the point where I stopped asking
her out. This marriage was turning out to be just like my
first one: all there was to eat was pictures of food.
Months later, I moved and sort of forgot to give Jane my
phone number. When I finally called her, she’d moved
without leaving a forwarding address. I let sleeping wives
lie, but every now and then without warning hope sang songs
in my heart like a TV commercial: Jane would love me back
if only I would love her better. Each time this happened,
plaque from the first marriage washed out of my arteries.
The second marriage, the real fake one, was cleansing me of
the first, the fake real one.
* * *
“Boston’s a confusing city,” my girlfriend Salley warned me
as we turned onto the Mass Pike one early morning a year
later.
“I don’t think it’ll be a problem,” I said. I was taking
her to meet my parents in Canada, and my green card still
hadn’t arrived. I needed a temporary visa to make sure I
could get back into America. I’d written the INS many
times, and then switched to phoning, but that just meant
being transferred from a clerk who didn’t understand to one
who didn’t have a clue. Our plane tickets were for that
evening, so I had to go in person. I was sure it was just a
bureaucratic snafu because they had all my original
documents as well as copies.
“Have you ever been to Boston before?” Salley asked.
“Just the airport.”
“Immigration is nowhere near the airport.”
“Oh. Well, I think it’s downtown.”
“Do you know where that is?”
“In the middle.”
Her hazel eyes flashed anger. I grinned. I loved the way
she drove a car, like a figurehead on the prow of ship,
plowing bust-first through traffic. She had reason to be
mad at me. I got lost inside office buildings. We drove in
silence until the buildings stood up, announcing the city.
“This looks like a good exit,” I said when we were almost
past it. She swerved off the highway, supremely irritated.
“Park over there,” I said, pointing to a small lot.
“You’re lost,” she said, slamming the door as she got out.
“Let’s walk this way.”
“You’re lost.”
I had no idea where we were, but a few crooked blocks later
there was the INS, looming like a headstone.
“So,” the agent said, “you need a temporary visa so you can
go back to Canada with your wife.”
“Uh…no. Salley is not my wife.”
“That woman out there in the waiting room is not your
wife?”
“No.”
“So where’s your wife?”
“Uh…” My stomach lurched. This complication had never
occurred to me.
“You mean you got married only in order to immigrate? It
wasn’t a real marriage?”
“No, it is real marriage.”
“How?”
My heart went squish. This man could send me under police
escort to the airport with a one-way ticket to Canada along
with a deportation order forbidding me to enter the United
States ever again.
“Because it’s celibate.”
“It’s a real marriage because it’s celibate?”
“Yes.”
“Are we getting anywhere here?”
“Yes. I fell in love with Jane.”
“Jane is your wife?”
“Yes. She’s my Ideal Woman. Which means I don’t have sex
with her.”
He blinked twice. “Do you and Jane live together?”
“No. My love for her is pure. I used to believe the natural
state of a man is celibacy and his first ‘honor and obey’
is to God. I didn’t realize until after my first marriage
ended that by being celibate I was avoiding God, not
honoring Him. By marrying Jane but not having sex with her
or living with her I am acknowledging my psychological
problem while at the same time freeing up the rest of me to
change. Salley is helping me with this.”
“Does Jane know about Salley?”
“Jane and I are both clear on the nature of our marriage.”
“…I’m not sure about this…”
“Could I write somebody a letter and explain it in detail?”
My armpits were soaked.
“Well, you’d have to leave out all the stuff about Freud!”
He rolled his eyes to the ceiling. “So…you were issued a
green card?”
“You mean you don’t know? But this is what bureaucracies
are for!” I glared at him like a Canadian, with
unimpeachable rectitude. He flushed with embarrassment,
then stamped my passport.
* * *
Several months later, I started
crossing Main St. at the exact moment Jane stepped off the
curb from the other side. We met on the double-yellow
center line. “It’s about time, isn’t it?” she asked, as if
we’d arranged this meeting.
“Give me your phone number. I’ll make the arrangements.”
The light changed. Cars roared past us on either side.
“You never told my parents, did you?”
“No.” I didn’t even know where they lived.
“Thanks. Bye!”
A month later, the clerk of the court read the details to
the black-robed judge sitting high above us. He called on
Jane. She stood up, obviously nervous. “Why do you want to
divorce Daniel after only a year and a half of marriage?”
She was wearing a ripped T-shirt and manure-smeared
overalls.
“Your honor, I’m at a place in my life where I really need
to get myself together and it’s a good thing my friends
said I could stay at their farm as long as I took care of
the animals because I really need a lot of time to myself
these days and I don’t have any money.” She paused, then
added, “Your honor.”
“You may sit down,” he said, and turned to me. I stood up
in my stiff wedding clothes.
“Why are you getting divorced from Jane after only eighteen
months of marriage?”
I looked at my lawful wedded wife and let hope go.
“Unrealistic expectations,” I said.
He banged his gavel. “I hereby pronounce you divorced.”
* * *
In a small town like
Northampton, I normally bumped into everybody I knew at
least once a month, but I didn’t see Jane or even hear
anything about her for nearly a year. That was so unusual
it was spooky. Then one hot summer day I was waiting for a
bus when something made me turn around. All I saw was my
own reflection in the plate-glass window of an old
small-town restaurant, until I shielded my eyes with my
hand and looked inside. All by herself in a booth far at
the back sat Jane. I waved my hand big and slow, since I
didn’t know if she could see me. She waved back, a big,
slow wave, a wry, sad smile on her beautiful face.
THE END
Published by Red Cedar Review, Michigan, Spring 2006 issue.